by Maggie Van Duyn | Sep 3, 2017 | anger, Breast Cancer, Children, Maggie Card, Progression
If you have children under the age of 10 then you probably have watched the hit movie sensation, “Trolls,” and you probably have memorized the words to every single song on the soundtrack. I’ve joked that Poppy is like my spirit, but animated, that, “I Will Get Back...
by Maggie Van Duyn | Feb 14, 2017 | anger, Cancer, Mastectomy, Metastatic Disease, Scanxiety
Dearest Amy Schumer, I’m coming to Montreal to see you on Friday, February 17th and I wanted to tell you that I’m going to need you to make an exceptionally funny show for me and the thousands of people who will also be attending your show. I mean, I know that you are...
by Maggie Van Duyn | Feb 3, 2017 | anger, Cancer, Fear
Vermont Gas Company came to inspect our furnace. The furnace looks great and is running well, but the gas guy noticed that we did not have a chimney liner. Like a normal home owner, I asked how much it would cost and he replied, “around $3,000.” Then I stopped acting...
by Maggie Van Duyn | Sep 7, 2016 | #maggiesbrightside, anger, Cancer, Metastatic Disease, Stage IV
Every time I get a scan, there is a piece of me that wants the doctor to say, “well actually, we were wrong. You don’t have cancer and if you just use activated charcoal for 3 months, you will be normal.” THAT would be the best news. But instead, at my last scan I got...
by Maggie Van Duyn | Mar 8, 2016 | anger, Cancer, Diagnosis, Doctors
Dear Primary Care Physician, I’ve been meaning to write you for a while. I first had the urge to reach out in November of 2014 when I arrived home from the hospital after giving birth to a baby that wasn’t even mine, as I had been a gestational surrogate...
by Maggie Van Duyn | Jan 29, 2016 | anger, Breast Cancer, Cancer, Diagnosis
This is one of those boring blog posts that is actually just a boring update with very little wit and very little creativity. But I gotta tell you, the only jokes I’m coming up with right now are the ones you probably aren’t quite ready for and my silver...