“Why are there so many songs about rainbows and what’s on the other side? Rainbows are visions but only illusions, rainbows have nothing to hide.

                                      What’s so amazing that keeps us stargazing?                                            And what do we think we might see?

                                     Some day we’ll find it, the Rainbow Connection                                     The lovers, the dreamers and me.”

-Kermit the Frog (just kidding, the real writer is named Paul Williams)

Photo Courtesy of Paul Gamba Photography

Photo Courtesy of Paul Gamba Photography

Cheesy post alert! Did you guys see this picture? I mean, is it ridiculous or what. And telling. People think it’s a sign. And who wouldn’t-I mean, you couldn’t ask for a better moment to snap a picture. It doesn’t even really look real, but I swear it is. If you haven’t checked out Paul Gamba Photography, you really should!

This weekend I went to NYC with some family to celebrate my brother-in-law Jonathon’s 40th birthday! It was as surprise, so we were all very hush hush about the whole thing. He was shocked, maybe a little mad at first, but then immediately realized that all of these people loved him so much and was brought to tears. I could relate.

Here’s what happened while I was gone: three amazing people painted my bedroom (see future post!) over the course of two days; a glorious group of guys and gals (including my kiddos, mother and step-father) walked in the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk, in honor of me, calling their group Miles for Maggie; food was dropped off at my house for nourishing and delicious dinners; care packages including beautiful earrings, cozy blankets, stickers for the kids, cook books, miracle broth and jelly beans (among other things) were delivered to my house; and my mother and step-father took care of my children, snuggling them through their sad moments and giggling through the happy ones so that I could spend a night away. I actually forgot I had cancer a few times.

I’ve been struggling to figure out how to express my gratitude. I’m afraid that if I start thanking people, I’ll forget someone and then I would feel terrible. The truth is I’m just really really incredibly lucky. I might be the luckiest person alive. This may sound crazy coming from someone who was just diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer, but let me direct you back to those pictures with the rainbows. See, the luckiest.

I have this cousin who I used to think was the luckiest. She and her friends always have the best time, get the best jobs, have the easiest children. They are a bunch of lucky ducks-I have been saying for years that they must have had a past life that was really terrible, like maybe they were slaves or something. It has only been a few years that I have realized that I am actually pretty lucky myself. I have a beautiful family, parents that love and support me, a house, a job I like….what more can you ask for? Blessed life, right?

Enter Stage IV Breast Cancer. It doesn’t really change anything. It’s just a chapter in my life. Even if I die (not the plan!) I’ll die in a pile of rainbows and cozy blankets and beautifully painted bedrooms and earrings and nourishment and prayers and blessings and snuggled children and supportive family members and love. And that makes me the luckiest.

Picture of group who walked for Miles for Maggie